Making Decisions and Figuring Things Out
The funeral was today. I guess I mean yesterday, seeing as how it's 1:30 in the morning. Too bad I just figured out what I'm giving up for lent: the snooze button. I know, I know, I'm a frigg'n genius. These things just come to me. I think it's what God wants me to give up, and I think it will impact sooooo many areas of my life. Who'd a' thunk it? One little button.....
I was gonna blog about the funeral, but it just seems too sacred in my heart to mess it up with my worldly words that could never capture how perfect it really was. I look in the mirror and see my daddy's eyes---eyes with ribbons of red lace springing from the ball of color. Only, of course, the catalyst for our bloodshot eyes is much different, but nonetheless, the same outcome. It's not what you think though. My eyes are not this way because I am grieving. No, this was brought on by tears of pure joy.
You see, I've been argueing with God about alot of things, the major of these recently being that Dominique could have been such a light to our school, and He chose to take her. Dominique wasn't your ordinary "qué será será" type of person. She made things happen. She didn't wait for you to ask her a question, she knew the answers and let you know they were there when you were ready. She was one of the few people who found that balance between accepting people and challenging them. In such a dark world, she was could have been the one to change our hearts.
Do you see? That was my side of the arguement. Arguements with God rarely end when you're finished with your side, as in human arguements. God said, "Trinitie, 'could have been'?" Hmm, God sure is wise. He can make me feel like an idiot with 4 small words. COULD HAVE BEEN? What was I thinking? Dominique WAS a light. That's just it. She was such an amazing person that she didn't need as much time as the rest of us to make her mark.
As conceited as it may sound, I feel like the duty has been passed onto me. Not just me, mind you. But it's partly my responsibility now to not let that spirit die. And, you know, that's an awesome responsibility.
Thank you Dominique. I miss you; we all do.
Trinitie