Let me give you a little background on my sis, Tancie (more commonly know as Toots by myself). She is more of a nomad than myself, and is never in the place I expect her to be. I see her about once a year, which is a little unnerving because we were best friends our entire lives, and that's hard to let go of. She chases after anyone who will call her beautiful, but can't seem to hang on to relationships (although she has been "engaged" about 50 times). She's 19. AND SHE SUCKS. I am so inc...

“It’s hard to stumble when on your knees,” the desktop read my freshman year.   In a mocking sort of retort, I had written, “Preach it!”   I figured whoever stole a message from a church marquee to defile public property deserved a little sarcasm.     They wrote back.   The next day, I walked into French class to find a message inquiring about my gender.   I said I was female, and apparently he (it turned out to be a boy) started feeling guilty ab...

That's right folks. I've never been kissed. I view kissing as a sacred act---something with which you only share with someone you are deeply in love with. Maybe that makes me naive, but I don't care. I would never kiss someone I didn't love, and this has thrown many of my "boyfriends" (if you wanna call them that) for a loop. I want the imaginary fireworks, I want the "I can't breath but I don't give a sh**" feeling, I want emotional stimulation. I want the guy to not care that I...

Dear Dad, I hate you. I hate that I try to love you despite...I hate that that's all I have to love---the despite. I hate that your words sting worse than anyone elses, and I don't know why. I hate that you make me curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep. I hate that you have the ability to hurt me. I wish you wouldn't ruin your mind and body with the drugs. I wish you wouldn't lie to me, I wish it didn't make me feel like such an idiot when you do. I wish you knew that I know. I wish I had...

My sister and I...we're more alike than she'd care to admit. The reason we find it so impossible to tolerate one another for long periods of time is because we see our own fakeness reflected. We're often artificially flavored, you could say. She won't tell you what she's thinking for fear of losing even a small piece of your love. Me? I'm gonna let you know. I'm not afraid of losing love, I'm afraid of losing admiration and respect and individuality. I won't let you know I'm crying inside, I...