When I disclose information about myself so nonchalantly to friends and even strangers, I often get confused and often ecclectic responses to my life experiences. For instance, when I tell people I lived in a vehicle for about a year and that I have, in fact, lived in a park, they look at me with not only pity, but bewilderment. Here's the deal. It's not that uncommon. So many people are sheltered from seeing that, yes, people do indeed live like that---even here in the great United S...
Do you ever just sleep when you're feeling down...just to escape the world? I slept far too long today. When I woke up, I only felt sick to my stomach. Sleeping as a remedy = not such a good idea. My problem? I can't love people. It's simply not in my power. I sat down to write a note of encouragement to my roomate, Kami, on her 24th birthday, and all that kept going through my head were all the things that aggravate me about the girl. I simply could not bring myself to write down...
Alright, I never claimed to be a poet. I was just trying to write a counter-point article on Imajinit's psychology post, and everything that came out contradicted itself. (This doesn't mean you've won Michael.) Anywho, I promise I'll never write poetry again, but I dedicate this to anyone who's ever left a comment on my blog. Please don't be harsh, this is like the 2nd (and probably the last) poem I'll ever write. Take nothing I say as absolute truth About myself or my position I'm a...
I'm terrified. I'm terrified of growing up. This baffles me because I like to think I was forced to grow up a little too fast due to my environment. Now, I'm not so sure. I wonder if anyone is as scared as I am to officially be on my own. I really won't be, I know. I have a wonderful sister who will be there along the way. But, it will soon be time for me to graduate, to find an actual job to help pay bills, to finally get a car of my own (I know, I know, I'm a loser, but hey, my f...
That's right folks. I've never been kissed. I view kissing as a sacred act---something with which you only share with someone you are deeply in love with. Maybe that makes me naive, but I don't care. I would never kiss someone I didn't love, and this has thrown many of my "boyfriends" (if you wanna call them that) for a loop. I want the imaginary fireworks, I want the "I can't breath but I don't give a sh**" feeling, I want emotional stimulation. I want the guy to not care that I...
My friend John is an aspiring clown. He carries around six tattered juggling balls all day and trys to teach anyone he encounters his favorite pastime. He has wonderful hair; it's rather fluffy and sticks straight out in all directions (it's part of his clown love). He comes to school every day with a new story for me about riding his unicycle and entertaining children around his apartment. He has a lot of character, more than most. I love John. The other day in class, while he was ju...
I like the lake by my parents trailer. I like it mostly just after winter's over, and the boats began to reappear. I like to sit on the dock and make shapes with my toes in the water. I like that I can't even feel the cold air around me because my thoughts take me away from reality. I even like it when I snap back and feel that sudden shock. I like that point when the last boat disappears around the bend in the lake and I'm alone---that means I can sing at the top of my lungs. I li...
The funeral was today. I guess I mean yesterday, seeing as how it's 1:30 in the morning. Too bad I just figured out what I'm giving up for lent: the snooze button. I know, I know, I'm a frigg'n genius. These things just come to me. I think it's what God wants me to give up, and I think it will impact sooooo many areas of my life. Who'd a' thunk it? One little button..... I was gonna blog about the funeral, but it just seems too sacred in my heart to mess it up with my worldly...
This is just a small taste of the kind of lyrics I enjoy. Clever for the most part. I could go on forever, but then you wouldn't read forever...would you? Here ya go: "Take my picture, hang it up so you can tear me down." ---Bouncing Off the Walls, Sugarcult "We can hide out under there. I just made you say 'underwear'." ---Pinch Me, Bare Naked Ladies "Words are like weight, with density and shape, modifying forms they evaporate." ---I Am Not the Only Cowboy, Josh Joplin Group...
Goodwill=Heaven on Earth! As soon as I walk in the door I go to town. I first check the shoe bins to see if they have yet to receive turquoise boots---the one thing I always look for. Nothing. Then comes the costume jewelry. I dip my hands into the crates of beads and earrings and spread them out between my fingers...lots of treasures waiting to be found. Among these are set of silver bracelets---the kind that clang together when one moves their arm; I love that sound. ...
Ahhh...what a wonderful afternoon. My sister, Tenille, and I went to library. Call me a loser if you like, this is where magic happens. I make my usual route---first to the autobiography section in the back. I pick up books on ancient heros, famous celebrities, and ordinary people who have suffered extraordinary struggles and survived. Some I simply lay back on the shelf without regards to where it lay in the first place. I'm selfish like that. Others catch my attention and I...
After going to another AA meeting with my sister and her teacher friend tonight, we went for ice cream at the Marble Slab. Debbie had a friend who was going to be there that night and wanted to introduce me because me and this chick are around the same age. She's all like, "Oh, Trin, you'll love her, she's really spiritual." Yeah, like I'm spiritual...haha. Anywho, what I'm saying is, in the back of mind, without even realizing it, I was praying the girl wouldn't be there. I have in...
I started to reply to Michaels article on music, but decided against it when my comment exceded normal bounds. The catalyst behind my tastes in music are no secret to me. It's not difficult to look back and see the impact all the people in my life had on me. I think I've always had a love of music, as far back as I can remember. The only movies I enjoyed watching were musicals like Crybaby and Grease. I would stand in front of T.V. for hours trying to learn the dance moves and l...
I came home a few hours early from school today. I threw myself on the couch and sobbed uncontrolably; there was no one left to watch---no one left to hender me from letting it go. I wished I could have fallen asleep, or at least just laid there in a daze with no thoughts to bring the facts back. But, unfortunately, those thoughts of mine never do stop. I picked myself up and slowly walked through every room in our apartment trying to decide what to do next. I'm not too good at...
No one has ever been able to tell me what color my eyes are. I have no idea what color they are; they change so often I can't keep up. I know many people who have this same trait, but I think with me it's different. At first I thought they changed with what I wore; that proved to be wrong. So, I came up with a theory that God blessed me with eyes that tell people how I'm feeling---since He didn't choose to bless me with the gift of communication. I've been keeping track of my f...